The moment of realization came as I sat in seat 16A burning in shame. After a series of peev-inducing but for the most part normal petty travel annoyances, I had snapped at the stewardess in a completely full-on childish/madam manner and then verbally attacked my husband when he pointed out quite reasonably that I was being unreasonable.
A series of buttons had been pushed to a point of no return and I was way beyond a few deep calming breaths. Air-rage aside and worries about being escorted from the plane by police notwithstanding, I did apologise to the stewardess, I named my shame, I admitted to acting like a spoilt brat.
But what makes us explode? How do we recognize the tell-tale signs and as travelling is a minefield for most people, how do we avoid the stresses, strains and fireworks when we are travelling?
Travelling is all about movement and change. Often we are stepping out of our comfort zone, throwing our lot in with a lot of strangers, opening up to new experiences and new ways of being, whilst trying to keep a check on money-tickets-passport… And we are propelling ourselves forward, whether it's a rickety bus up the Himalayas or the high-speed red-eye between London and New York.
Finding our rhythm is relatively easy at home, but travelling can completely disrupt our daily routines and rhythms and even knock us sideways.
We are trying to keep a check on all our stuff, making sure we are on the right vehicle and we may be also dealing with heat, sleep deprivation and tiredness, frustration, over excited children, language and communication barriers.
Beyond time zones and body clocks, travelling really requires you to be in the present moment. You need to be alert. Be aware of your body, your breath… see what changes come about when you have to rush, or when you have to wait around.
If you feel stressed or frustrated, just acknowledge it. And drop expectations… the perfect journey is only what you make of it and delays, cancelations etc. all happen.
Whether it's the jetlag, the crowds or the unknown that unsettle you, I believe that the the best way to travel is to try and keep some of your own rituals in place.
If you do a regular morning meditation or practice try and do it before you set off, or even just close your eyes and tap into that energy while you are standing in line or waiting for your bus to pull up.
This is where mantra comes into its own - you can chant silently and create a feeling of calm and protection through the vibrations of the words, even internally. You can create a still-point when everything else is moving around you. Whether I'm jumping into a rickshaw or a 747, I always chant a protection mantra as I set off, and I have it on good counsel that it works wonders for finding a parking space in the middle of London too…
Or simply make a little affirmation to yourself (and maybe it's a good idea to do it with your partner or family too) to enjoy the journey and not to sweat the small stuff. (You can also download meditations from http://www.themeditationpodcast.com/)
Psychologists have determined that people in the West generally need 18 inches of personal space to feel comfortable. Naturally this is often infringed when travelling.
I don't like crowds and living in India, where they scrum rather than queue, I get emotionally dishevelled very quickly and my 'comfort bubble' is often burst, but sometimes you need to drop your sense and sensibilities (and your pride and prejudices for that matter) and simply get on with it, otherwise you might see your bus pull out of the station without you on it.
Know thyself…
Is getting up at the crack of dawn to make an early flight or bus your idea of hell? Do you have earplugs to hand? Have you really got time to check out the entire contents of duty-free or should you give yourself time and peace of mind by heading to the security check early?
Keeping hydrated is essential in creating emotional balance, so always have water to hand. At the other end of the spectrum and seemingly utterly contradictory, if you like your coffee or your cigarette, this is no time to detox!
Although caffeine dehydrates, a little cappuccino might be exactly what you need to propel you through check-in without a temper tantrum. Like many people, I get irritated if I don't eat regularly, so create a smooth ride by making sure you eat and drink regularly, keep checking in with your body. It's easy when you are in a different environment to forget your basic needs.
Getting Grounded
It sometimes takes time to fully land somewhere after traveling, whatever the distance. Take time to connect to the space - your new environment whether it's a hotel room for a business meeting or a bamboo hut…
Create a harmonious space with an altar - it is the perfect way to turn a hotel room into a sacred space. It can be as simple or as elaborate as your luggage allows. An altar can center you and create calm - important while you are on the move.
My altar fits into a small jewellery bag - there's a small jade Ganesha, sea shells and crystals picked up along the way, a 4x6" picture of my Master, incense and a tea-light holder… it goes everywhere with me and creates a space for sadhana (daily practice) wherever I lay my hat. My altar calms my nomadic spirit and inspires future adventures.
Scented candles and incense can transform an ordinary room - whether it's an anonymous 5star room or a place with questionable cleanliness.
As for crystals, amethyst is good to calm the mind, hematite for grounding, tourmaline will help dissolve the stress of travel and Golden Calcite will help integrate new energies and beliefs into your physical reality!
Travel like most things comes down to trust… know yourself and trust yourself… and if all else fails, pull the knob to inflate your life jacket…