Feeling Stuck 
Most of us can feel at times that we are like one of those hamsters that keep running inside a small wheel in a cage.
An alarming image in the Jewish mythological ‘Midrashic’ texts is that we are all like insects in a jar, which climb and fall, climb and fall. Life can feel so relentless, fast, busy, stressful, anxious and uncertain. We dream of stopping, of holidays, of lazing by the sea, of getting off the wheel.
Never Satisfied
But stopping is not so easy. We feel peace during short moments of a break, relative to the busyness that was. But if the break continued for long we would soon begin to lose that peace.
Even if we really go to that desert island that we dream about, how long would it take to begin to feel bored and restless and that life is passing us by?
Even if we have that holiday we have been saving up for, it may not feel that much different from regular life, as we run about busily sightseeing, or arguing about what everyone wants to do within the family.
Gradual Adaptation
It is not easy to stop because we have strong built- in habits of restless activity. So the first understanding is that stopping has to happen gradually. We have to get used to it and then we will get to love it.
Our body tells us the pace. We can try the experiment of sitting quietly and watching how long before we need to move: probably not more than a few minutes initially (unless we are sitting in front of an exciting movie – but then our body is stopped but the story is racing).
If we sit quietly every day, soon the body can sit for longer and longer, as meditators well know.
Peace Begins Within
If we want to know real peace, we will need to deal with the habits internally not just the conditions externally. And this needs some effort and skill. Paradoxically, to stop and know real peace is quite an active process. One of the main tasks is to really know and see what is it in us that makes us restless.
We need to recognise and let go of the stress and the habits of un-ease. For example we can sit or lie in deep relaxation and check in the body where are the regions of stress and contraction. By meeting each and letting it go, we introduce a state of inner peace.
Our Challenges
But it goes deeper than that, because those habits are connected to basic human survival drives, which have a tendency to take us over. For example the basic need for sustenance becomes a relentless drive for more.
The need to cope with threat may make us live with low-level anxiety, as if there is always some risk or threat that we haven’t thought of.
Our views, opinions, conflicts, thoughts, fantasies, memories, disappointments, frustrations and so on , all written into our biography, will also be a constant source of agitation.
RAIN
One way we can deal with all of these is by the acronym RAIN. R is Recognize. First we need to clearly recognize and acknowledge what it is that is stealing our peace. For example if it is a habit of self-criticism or judgement, we need to see it clearly, and name it.
A is Acceptance. It is helpful to accept what is arising as just that – what is arising. And accept ourselves as we are.
I is for Investigate. Look into your unpeacefulness, see its dimensions, its projections onto the body, the way it runs through your mind-feeling-body system.
And N is for Non-Identification. It is taking a step back and becoming a witness of the uncomfortable phenomenon that is arising. That will allow us to remain in peace even in the presence of disturbing guests, that, as Rumi said, invade our house and overturn our furniture.
Stopping cannot be forced. It is not achievable by aggressively trying to control ourselves. Nevertheless it needs some intention and persistence.
Many forms of meditation exist which help to quieten our minds. Use of a mantra, the breath, or of a candle, are obvious examples. This is very easy to learn, but not so easy to sustain. One needs some kind of regularity of practice to deepen the concentration or steadiness of the mind.
Coming Home To Ourselves
The truth is that we don’t need to hunt for inner peace. It is already inside us, though often much covered over. We enjoy the quiet of a forest, the sea, the cup of tea on the veranda, because it brings us back home to a place that we already know, going right back to the experience of the deep peace of feeding at our mother’s breast.
The Sanskrit word ‘Samadhi’ is used for deep quiet and it actually means to gather ourselves together, to bring ourselves back home.
There is a famous ancient Buddhist story about a forest brigand called Angulimala who killed 999 people and was looking for his 1000th victim. The Buddha heard about him and against the advice of his concerned disciples insisted on entering the forest alone. Soon Angulimala found him and began to chase him. The Buddha walked, steadily, but for some reason Angulimala simply couldn’t catch him, however fast he ran. So he shouted to the Buddha ‘Stop, Stop!’
The Buddha turned and looking at him straight in the eyes said: ‘I stopped a long time ago. You stop!’ This was such a surprise to Angulimala that all his aggressive intention evaporated and he asked him what he meant. Of course it gave the Buddha the opportunity to explain to him the teachings and soon Angulimala joined the forest monks.
What the Buddha meant was that he had stopped making waves - creating friction, suffering, agitation and harming himself or others. He had got off the wheel and stopped in Nirvana, living freely without resistance to the stream of life.
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