The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. Gandhi
When wronged, we often end up focusing on the anger we have towards the person who hurt us. The pain we feel and the humiliation we have suffered are standing before us, blocking our view. We become blinded by our own emotional baggage, almost paralyzed by the anger we feel. These emotions hold us hostage, making it difficult to forgive.
Inwardly directed anger together with misplaced pride hinders any progress for us in a better direction. We can feel like fools or 'suckers' for allowing a situation or person to be forgiven. Inwardly directed anger together with misplaced pride hinders any progress for us in a better direction.
Forgiveness is like a golden key that sets one free from emotions that are nothing but anchors or weights dragging one down to the depths of the deepest sea.
Letting go of the burden of anger and hurt can give one a feeling of freedom and in my own experiences forgiveness has become something that I can no longer live without.
The first time I decided to forgive and pray for my enemies it seemed ridiculous, but I was running out of options.
Hanging on to the anger and injustice was doing me no good, so I finally decided to try forgiveness. Initially it appeared to be an insurmountable hurdle, but once I was up in the air and on my way, I found myself sailing over to the other side. It became effortless.
We often prefer to do things the hard way rather than the smart way. Forgiveness is the smart way. It isn't as difficult as we perceive it to be. More importantly it has a way of freeing one's spirit from the chains of others, and opening up one's life to countless joys.
Here's my story: I was quite happy in a former job until I was very unfairly dismissed. A decision had been made in a very unilateral manner, and I was not given the ability to relate my side of the story. It could have been a decision made out of jealousy or a need for power, whatever, in my opinion my dismissal was not fair.
Having me banned from work may have given my adversary temporary emotional satisfaction, but it caused me months, if not years, of pain, questioning, and anger. At first I tried to force the issue. I wanted justice. I wanted to say my piece. I wanted to reveal the situation for what it really was, but I had no chance.
No one was willing to listen. I was a little fish in a very big and unforgiving pond. I felt despair. I suffered from depression, anger, and stress. I had been cheated.
While there was no good reason this had happened, I had no means of resolving the problem at the time, so it churned and ultimately festered inside me. When I had run out of options, I turned to prayer and forgiveness.
When you forgive, you in no way change the past, but you sure do change the future. Bernard Meltzer
Instead of focusing on how others couldn't see things my way, I focused on how others must be feeling to have behaved in this manner. Was this person who hurt me insecure? Angry? Unfulfilled? It seemed that I was in a better place than she, despite having been wronged.
I decided to pray for resolution of whatever it was that caused her to be so unjust and hurtful to me. Solving the root of her problems in general would be better than solving my specific problem. It would have broader impact and bring with it a deeper understanding for others, as well as freeing me to use all those wasted feelings in a more positive way.
Forgiveness allowed me get rid of emotions that were impeding my path to a peaceful and fulfilling life. Now I'll gladly stop by the forgiveness depot anytime! I've seen what it can do.
Once one feels the power of forgiveness in his or her life, he/she will never have to wallow in that stagnant pond of entrenched emotions again. It is so refreshing to be out of the bondage of needing either justice or vengeance.
I am free from the blind alley I wandered down when I was heavily laden with sadness and grief. Forgiveness has lifted me out, shone me a new light, and caused me to rise above the turbulence below. When one steps outside of an unfair situation and shears off all emotions clinging to the event, a new picture emerges that allows forgiveness to work its way into one's heart, and ultimately to be doled out in generous portions to those who need the spiritual and emotional healing much more than we do.
I'll encourage you to try forgiveness in your life, really having compassion for the one who hurt you and praying that he/she finds what he needs to heal and to stop hurting others. You can physically move on in life without that person being able to hurt you again, and forgiveness truly rids you of the burden of toxic emotions.
Forgiveness is freeing, uplifting, and healing. Set yourself free from old patterns and put yourself in the role of healer, for yourself and for others. A higher plane of being does exist, and it truly is divine.